all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
