You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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