I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize