I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
