Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Randomize
