I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
