My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
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