Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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