even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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