at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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