Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I want her autograph on my taint
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
