Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize