She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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