I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize