i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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