I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
