and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
So vagazzling was a success
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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