so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
sarcasm needs its own font
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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