I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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