Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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