i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
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