The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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