I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
