That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
