dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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