Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
