i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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