RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Randomize