So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize