i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I lost the right to judge tonight
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize