He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
