I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
