I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
