I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
