awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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