actually, I'm a sock model
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
