It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
