Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
