Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
