Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
