i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
