I think i sorta joined a cult last night
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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