Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize