So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize