dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
