I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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