Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize