Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
My vagina is officially offended.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
