She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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