you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize
