that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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