try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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