Are we in a gay sports bar?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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